It's a fundamental part of our religion to believe in fate and pre-destiny. This can be a good thing, because when we get into fender benders with our parents cars we can say "It's not my fault, it was the will of Allah! It was going to happen anyway!" but it can be a bad thing because it can leave us feeling helpless.
Someone very close to me was telling me though, that dua (supplication) is the only thing that can actually alter destiny. A few days later, I got my daily hadith email (courtesy of Adaptive Solutions: http://dailyhadith.adaptivesolutionsinc.com/) which actually discussed this topic, and it did so in the clearest way possible:
"Some people wonder what the use may be of making Duas. They say that since everything is preordained, and the good and bad written in one’s Taqdeer (Qismet/preordainment) will come to one anyway, why make Dua? But Taqdeer should be understood as a vault, a very big safe deposit box. In that vault is one’s Paradise and Hell, good and bad. When we make Dua we ask for the good things in the vault to be given to us.
Imaam Ibn al-Qayyim said to invoke Taqdeer to counter Taqdeer. Thus, if you have an accident, then ask Allah for recovery from it. Since Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) has kept every good thing in store for us, He gets angry if we don’t ask Him for any of those good things. To not ask Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) for things is to be ungrateful towards Him.
We can understand this from our own experience: Suppose you gather together all the things your children would love to have. Then you ask your children if they would like to receive these wonderful treats you got for them. Some of your children run to you happily saying “Yes, please!” and some of your children keep sitting indifferently saying “Well, if you got them for us, you’ll give them to us anyway.” Which attitude of your children would you be more pleased with?
Ask for the good that Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) has deposited in the vault for you, and ask Him to keep the bad in it away from you."
I'm the kind of guy that needs some more hadith to back a grand idea like this up though, so a quick google search took me to AlQuranClasses.com. This appears to be very neat and tidy, Muslimah run website that seems worth checking out, but they had an article similar to this one, but they've got references. (Usually I go to searchtruth.com, but their search wasn't yielding any results, so these hadith may not be in those books.)
Anyway, their article can be found at:
and the supporting hadith they have are:
The Prophet (Peace be upon Him) said: “Nothing can change the Divine decree except Dua.”(Narrated by Ahmad, 5/677; Ibn Maajah, 90; al-Tirmidhi, 139. Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 76687. See also al-Saheehah, 145)
It was narrated from Ibn ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (Peace be upon him) said: “Du’aa’ may be of benefit with regard to what has already happened or what has not yet happened, so adhere to Du’aa’, O slaves of Allaah.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (3548)
The Prophet (Peace be upon Him) said: “No precaution can protect against the decree of Allaah. Du’aa’ is beneficial with regard to what has been decreed and what has not been decreed. The du’aa’ meets the calamity that has been decreed and wrestles with it, until the Day of Resurrection.” (Narrated by al-Tabaraani, 2/800 (33). Al-Albaani said in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 7739, (it is) hasan).
As a bit of a disclaimer, you can't change destiny in the sense of going against God's will. At the end of the day, something is going to happen to you, and it'll be what God has written, dua is just a request for timeline re-evaluation, and to have what WAS written changed to something else.
So, there you are! Keep calm and make dua! :)
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